Computer love

You know the feeling when a worldwide pandemic keeps you separated from your loved ones for an entire year? Funnily enough, so do I. We are a year in to the ‘new normal’ being, well, not so new at all. I’m not sure I even know how to use a knife and fork anymore, let alone attend a Michelin star dining experience. Digital dates have proven to be not just a huge source of pleasure for me, but an integral way to feel connected to other human beings during our shared experience of this completely surreal time. Everything about online dates has proven to be a delight for me - the ritual of the preparation, the same old anticipation I feel before a dinner date, the glowing giddiness afterwards. It’s all still there, it’s just… pixelated. I’ve had so much fun with them, whether they’re quick catch ups, philosophical musings around our current circumstances, or plain old smutty and depraved -adult- chats. While I’m a millennial who grew up on AIM and MSN and Myspace, I’ve always had a strong aversion towards phone calls and the like. But the process of dating through the phone this past year has completely transformed. Rather than a pang of anxiety when I hear that first chime of my FaceTime ring, I’m instead inflicted with a pang of full body anticipation. It’s pretty incredible, if not somewhat embarrassing when I have company. Friends just can’t understand why I’ve developed a fetish for Zoom. But I’m sure you might after our date.

You can schedule online dates the same way you would schedule an in person date, and my assistant Elizabeth would be much obliged to help with any questions you may have. They don’t have to include video if you’re camera shy and whichever form of call or video call you prefer is easy to accommodate. Whether you’re an old friend or a prospective date, there’s no need to waylay plans you’ve been excited about indefinitely. I’m a strong advocate for making your fun happen now, and during this not-so-new-normal, it’s never been so important to make that time for yourself. So hopefully I’ll be seeing you soon. On my laptop screen no less.